A lot can happen in a year even though it seems that each year that goes past as we get older, goes quicker like sand that seeps through our fingers. In the past 12 months or so, I could not tell you enough of the changes that I have been feeling mentally and emotionally. That is not to say changes can’t be physical either but really, I am so positive that all of you have woken up in a different light many times in your life (if you have not, you are either lying or about to experience it soon enough smiley face). I could also not tell you enough that I have had the most riveting, and emotionally challenging year that was full of the tears, the laughters, that feeling of heart-in-stomach as well as distress. How often does it happen that in the end there might have actually been nothing to worry about in the first place? Yep, happens all the time but we humans, just have to deal with our emotions being played with in such situations. -.- After all, what constitutes as being a challenge if there is nothing to overcome?
At a current age of 22 years old, you may feel that my writing this is mature for my age, but I can also tell you that a) I’m so much better than the writing than I am with the talking and b) I have my childish moments and have yet to learn in social situations…but that is key – I am learning!
We beat ourselves up too much constantly (or I have done so countless times before anyways) about how we should be and act just because of some social convention or another. We are absolutely allowed to feel NOT okay yet the moment we don’t it’s like a sin, pure poison that eats at our flesh and spits right back out a reflection of our bad self. Why feel bad about feeling bad? At this point I wish to give a mathematical answer and just say a negative plus a negative equals a positive 🙂 (But BEWARE: negativity also breeds negativity…let’s call this negativity x negativity). It’s cool to feel bad about feeling bad but in the aftermath, please feel good…I have learnt all too well this year that change is vital in our development of character.
I have graduated from university for almost two months now but the year prior to that was full of hard work and exhaustion to say the least. Even at moments where you try so hard to keep yourself head strong (when inside, you know all-too-well your sensitivity levels are running high), comes the breaking point. Like an elastic band that has been over-stretched and snaps. I studied Fashion Design and that field is greatly immense in pressure and in competition. For many, they could not comprehend those very two words to be full of hard work but rather an airhead subject which infuriates me a little…but I won’t go into too much detail in this post. However, if something really matters to you, more often than not, it will stress you out but in the long term CHANGE YOU FOR THE GOOD.
Reflecting back…change is the way I feel good, because I have become a better me. Fashion, I’m coming for you!